Are You Being Your BEST, TRUE Self?

In life can you honestly say you are being your best, true self? By this I mean are you being honest with who you are, confident to live as you, And always be yourself no matter the situation?

Do you have the confidence to be yourself and present that to the outside world?

At school and college I was always shy and really lacked the confidence to be myself, share my truth or put myself out there. Looking back I feared rejection so I kept myself down, hid away and didn’t share my real self unless it was with people I trusted.

This got me thinking, How many people other people are hiding themselves away or diming their light because they lack the confidence to ‘just’ be themselves at work, in business, socially, or even at home?

Or they adjust their personality to suit various situations or people? I’ve done this as well. Shown different sides of myself to certain people so they might accept me.

The reality is you can and should always be your True, Real and Authentic self and by doing so you’ll always bring the BEST version of yourself to each part of your life.

If people are unable or unwilling to accept the true you, well then I’d say **** them. Be YOU and find those people who accept you for who you are.

However the POWER in my opinion is you have to accept YOURSELF first. Hiding your true self away will only cause you pain and keep your light dim.

So how do you gain the confidence to be yourself, put yourself out there and be the best version of yourself? 

1) Accept who you currently are.

Learn who you are, what you are about and your values as a person. Discover yourself both your good and bad sides (we all have them).

Then accept yourself. Self acceptance goes a hell of a long way in boosting self belief and understanding your true value. Sure you’ll have to accept the ‘not so good’ parts of you, but if those parts hinder you…Then look at No.2.

2) Change, Adapt or Advance what doesn’t fit for you. 

If there’s a part of your personality that doesn’t fit your life and causes you pain…Work on changing it. Don’t be a arse **** and just accept it.

Adjusting our behaviour/s is essentially what we must do to develop as people. So it’s just a case of changing negative, damaging, disempowering behaviours with more positives ones. I won’t BS, this is tough, however over time with the right support, you can do this.

3) Know your worth

Know your true worth and value in all parts of life. Know what you bring to the world and honor that. Honor your gifts, personality, value and shine your light on the world around you.

4) Practise.

It sounds simple but just practise being you. Go to places and groups where you don’t know anyone and be you. Put yourself out there without fear of judgement or the need to be accepted. Then once you have confidence here, be you with those closest to you, those people can often be the toughest for us to be ourselves around.

5) Focus on something else. 

When you feel the fear of being your true self, or putting yourself out there, focus on something else. Be interested in other people, ask them questions and focus on getting to know them.

Direct your attention somewhere else and be curious of others and that will help you relax.

6) Repeat all the above and keep pushing to be you.

It’s not easy and it may take you a long time, but it’s worth it because the alternative is always you keeping you down, hiden, trapped and not valuing yourself…

Probably the worst thing you can do to yourself mentally is not valuing who you REALLY are.

 

David

PS: I’ll be launching a series of MasterMind coaching events soon just for guys. 

Focusing on helping men to level up their mind and body to reach their truest potential.

The best way to think of your potential in my opinion is;

“You know that you are capable of doing and being much more in this world…But right now you feel like you’re being held back or not confident to go ahead and become that person. Your potential and all you are capable of is being subdued”. 

My one day events will help you lay the foundations to overcome your adversities, overcome challenges you face and step up to being all you can be.

PPS: If you’re a guy, head to the link below and get notified first about the event. PLUS get my Man-Unleashed Daily Guide to super charge your Fitness, Focus, Finance and Fulfilment. 

https://mailchi.mp/49b84add0c9a/man-unleashed

What The Hell is Personal Development

What the hell is Personal Development and why should you care?

Personal development for me is about growing and enhancing a person’s self awareness, capabilities, skills, behaviours and self confidence to uncover and unleash someone’s full potential.

It’s helping a person get past their limiting beliefs or self doubts and in truth it’s about getting MORE out of yourself so you can DO, BE and ACHIEVE all you are in any area of Life, Business, Career and Body.

In short personal development is about growing as a person in one area of life or all areas. However I believe for the BEST results its about levelling up in every area.

What I teach my clients is that their goal is off in the future, a bigger ‘thing’ they are trying to reach or accomplish. So compared to their goal they are smaller, further away and currently NOT ready to achieve it, Because if they could…They would have already.

It’s like taking on their own mountain but having to learn to climb first to reach the top.

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Knowing where you are right now is about establishing reality and current positioning, any coach that BS a client at this point isn’t helping them, they are hindering them. Knowing where you are, warts and all is essential.

So personal development is what bridges the gap between where you are right now and the goal you desire.

It’s centred around growing as a person in mind, body, skill, capabilities and confidence so you can conquer that goal. It’s you levelling up and becoming more as an individual…So now you are capable of attaining and owning your goal.

 

Without self development we wouldn’t have laid the foundations to reach our goal or hold on to it.

Any worthwhile goal is achieved this way, hence why personal development is critical.

I base my coaching around developing people and helping them get more out of themselves…More than they ever thought possible so they can set goals, increase their capabilities and then own the sh*t out of their goals.


The Process

My approach is based on 3 critical steps to show a person how to develop towards their goal/s:

  1. Clarity

  2. Confidence

  3. Performance


Clarity

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This is about gaining clarity around who you are and what you want. This for me is essential and was one area of life I was really stuck in. I just couldn’t get clear on who I was or what I wanted.

Often this is the part people miss and they design their wants by what others around them have or do. They basis their requirements off what they ‘think’ they should do or have and worse still what society or social media dems to be right.

This is making people feel more lost, isolated and frustrated than ever before.

By doing some deep self discovery work you can understand YOU, who you are and what life you want to experience everyday. In all honesty your career, business, income, home, relationships and lifestyle are behind this in order of clarity.

This part is about you and knowing what turns you on, what makes you tick and what inspires you. Everything else is there to enable this to happen.

Clarity is very difficult to achieve on your own because it requires you being asked great questions by a coach that can help you think deeper and really question yourself.


Confidence

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Another essential piece to the puzzle because a lack of self belief is the number ONE reason most people don’t achieve their goals or start in the first place.

A limiting belief, fear, doubt or insecurity is holding more people back from going after what they truly want than any other barrier.

So building self confidence, awareness and emotional intelligence is huge. A big part of my coaching is build around becoming self assured in who you are and what you are capable of. This is much more than just reciting positive talk. It’s about practising self confidence and knowing you.

Yes confidence is practised. I will have you look at any area of your life right now you feel confident and comfortable in. May be its work, or a hobbie..

Now ask yourself how long have you been doing that for? What makes you confident at it? How many hours have you put into it?

Confidence is partly about discovering yourself. Partly about doing something over and over to get better at it, and…Well you’ll have to become a client to find out the rest 🙂

Once you build self esteem you’ll be unstoppable.


Performance

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The final piece to the personal development system is performance.

Increasing your performance is essential because you can not become all you can be with the same habits, mindset, behaviours and actions you use now, Think about that.

There will be certain behaviours and habits you have right now that help you and you’ll be able to move forward with. However some are hindering you and you’ll need to ditch them or maybe you can re-shape them into better habits.

Increasing performance is all about optimising how you Think, Act, Behave, Eat, Move, Sleep and Produce to enhance you as a person. Giving you greater energy, clarity, focus, production and awareness…And reducing stress, overwhelm, fatigue, burn out and procrastination.

Once you have the clarity and the confidence, NEXT you require the high performance habits that will get you doing what you want to do every day to get you to your objectives.

I coach my clients how to enhance what they do so they can set out each day fully equipped to take it on.


What Next?

So the goal or objective you have set for yourself will become achievable once you can do the above 3 steps, Add into the mix; Strategic planning, breaking down limiting beliefs, accountability and daily action steps and you have yourself one hell of a system.

Are you frustrated because you’re struggling to gain clarity around your next career or business move?

Do you struggle with self confidence when it comes to making certain decision or actions?

Are you an ambitious person but feel lost or like you’ve reached a ceiling and not sure what to do next?

Would you like to become a more effective business owner or leader to reach a higher level of income and success?

Do you want to reduce stress and self doubt WHILST gaining balance in your Life, Body and Business for more fulfilment, value and success?

If so, then I am here to help!

If you are a corporate professional or business owner I will take you through a personally tailored program that meets your needs.

No more living or playing the game of life at an average level…It’s time to become all you can be.

I will work with you 1-1 for 3-12 months to help you get more out of yourself personally and professionally than you ever thought possible.

If you are interested in what I offer and would like to speak further, then message  at wilkinsondj@hotmail.co.uk or contact me via LinkedIn HERE

 

WHY Time is The Wrong Metric For Evaluating Work

Time is the wrong metric to evaluate work productivity.

For as long as we, organisations and businesses continue to put the intention on time being a viable way to assess work productivity, we will continue to miss out on how to get the very best out of ourselves and people.

It’s not about how much time you work it’s about how effectively you use that time.

Optimise your energy, productivity and work space for maximum results and to #winyourday

So what ways could we optimise our work productivity to ensure we get more done in less time?

1) Check emails first.

Ok there are a boat load of books and guru’s out there that say, don’t check email until lunch time. I get why they say that…

BUT…

Sometimes you might get an email that requires your attention, that if left a minute longer could burn down your day, business or other. Sometimes your messages are something you need or are working on, so checking them later in the day doesn’t really sit.

HOWEVER checking them at the start of your work day and then giving them a priority level would be more effective.

Label what emails need direct attention, what emails need and can be done later and which ones you don’t need to respond to at all.

Be more effective with what you do. You can use Gmail for this.

2) Get creative head space.

If you work in an office or a place where you are or can be constantly bothered then doing creative work in there if going to be a ball ache.

You need clarity and space to do creative work.

I like to be able to go to my local coffee shop and get my head down for 3hours and do my creative work there. For people that are self employed this is Zen because it gives you space. Or maybe go to your favourite place for productive work.

If you work in an office and need to do creative work then is there somewhere you can go to create head space?

3) Turn Your Notifications OFF.

Nothing worse than getting plugged in for a day of work and then constantly having your phone binging or beeping all day.

Social media and email notifications are designed to get your attention and more often than not they will. Each little break in distraction takes on average 64 seconds to get you back into what you were doing.

So if that phone or even on your computer is going off every 10-15min just image how many mental distractions that’s giving you throughout your work day.

Get those notifications off and phone on silent.

There’s a time and a place for social media.

4) Get moving.

A study showed that for every 3hours we sit down in a row each day without moving we can over time take 2years off our life span.

It’s no joke that periods of sitting is damaging our health, our backs, necks, joints, metabolism, digestion and well-being.

The key, get up every 60-90min and move for 3-10minutes. Go for a walk, stretch, do some squats, do something. Have fun and be creative with the movements you do.

It’s great for a mental and physical break and you’ll feel the benefits when you return to your desk.

5) Drink water.

Yeah this is obvious but I doubt many do it. When sitting at your desk have a 1lire bottle of water and aim for 2 of these per day. Have a sprinkle of sea salt in for your minerals.

Get that brain hydrated.

Just a few simple tips for optimising your work space and productivity for maximum results.

David

PS: Check out details for my upcoming event for how to Win Your Day by optimising each part of your day and life.

Click the link for details:

https://mailchi.mp/18dc5a77e2fb/optimialevents

 

The Struggle in Business is REAL

If you’ve been in business long enough you’ll know that it’s a roller coaster of ups and downs, wins and knockbacks.

There are times when you’re on top and then times when you feel like you just want to close the doors and walk away…It’s certainly not for the faint hearted.

Overall it’s usually a mixture of passion, drive, fun and a pigheaded attitude that keeps us going. That sense of something I’ve created, built and achieved is a huge driver for people. As well their ability to partly control their income, energy and future.

A driving passion that gets up on a morning is helping people with the skills, influence and knowledge I have, supporting them towards their goals and dreams.

During a performance coaching session with a client of mine who has recently set up their own business with a colleague it became apparent the early issues they face.

Where are we going, how will we get there and what is expected of us by and for each other?

The same can be true for you in business in both a partnership setting or on your own.

Managing your expectations and commitments to your work, self-management and productivity is king.

This newly formed business partnership started because they had a common passion and drive to create something amazing and they know they have a place in their market for it.

They have the skills and knowledge in their field, however running a business is a different animal all together.

So here’s what was discovered in my clients session:

They need to get clear on the following and have this completely mapped out to avoid bigger issues, fall outs and challenges down the line.

  • Where are we going? (Vision)
  • How will we get there? (Strategic plan)
  • How will we track our individual performance? (Their working performance)

 


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No.1 The Vision for your business is critical. Without it you will continue to just tread water and stay frustrated with your lack of direction and progress.

Especially in a business partnership knowing the vision of the company is key and that both people are pulling in the same direction.

Everyone thinks they have a vision but a recent survey of business owners suggested that less than 30% of them are crystal clear on the objectives and future of their business.


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No.2 The Strategic Plan. How will we get to the vision? If one person has one view point and the other has their own, then there will be is a continuous butting of heads. This is the major issue my client faces right now.

One party believes in doing it ‘this’ way and the other ‘this’ way. Its creating friction and a lack of progress. Neither are right or wrong, this issue is they aren’t on the same page.

Mapping out HOW to best get to the objectives of the business that include both parties is key. This is what we are working on in coaching and doing some facilitation to solve.

If you have your own business you won’t have this issue because you’ll make the final decision. However what you might struggle with is selecting the best plan for you and actually sticking with it. Food for thought.


Performance

No.3 Personal Performance. This is how your work in monitored. In a self employed basis you might measure yourself against a simple metric of money in vs money out. The business is growing if I have more money in than the previous month or year.

That’s the very basics of what you want to measure your self performance against. Getting KPI’s in place is key for ANY business owner. Discovering what these are can sometimes be a little trickier.

How will you measure your performance and ultimately the performance of your business?

In my clients case they need this for each other because there’s nothing worse than one person who feels like they are doing more for the work than their partner.

KPI’s need to be put into place to manage expectation levels and to have a standard of ‘This is what you do and this is how you know what you’re doing is working’.

It’s not complicated but it can be easily missed.


 

Opening a business is exciting especially at the start because the possibilities are endless. You can feel the energy and drive coming off you in spades at the start.

In all that excitement ensure that the BASICS are done, the above 3 are just the start of that.

Regardless if you are on your own, a partnership or a team, getting those 3 things right at the start will save you huge headaches down the line.

The work you do ON your business isn’t just on marketing, sales and creating more programs/services…The work is also creating the vision, the plan and how you will get there and measure/track this along the way.

It’s not always sexy but it is essential.

David.

For my Business Performance Coaching services information and to find out more head over to:

https://davidwilkinsonperformance.com/business-coaching/

Look Back to Look Forward For 2019…

It’s that time of year again, a fresh start, a time for new or updated goals and resolutions to be set.
As I sit down and start to get clear on the year ahead, I’m reminded of the power of reflection.

See what so many of us do is we become reactive to our current feelings and emotions.

For example, ‘I’ve put weight on, So I need to hit the gym 5 days per week and detox myself to lose it, I’ve got to get this weight off ASAP’.

Or ‘I hate my job I need a new career so I going fully into that’.

Or ‘I’m broke after Xmas I need to earn more money’.

Or ‘I’m surrounded by negative people so I need to get away from them’.

These are all valid goals, However before you start transforming your entire life I implore you to spend some time looking back over the past 12months and asking yourself some key questions;


What did you learn or discover about yourself? 

What made you happy? 

What do you want to do more off and then what do you want to do less of?

What’s changed in your life over the past year? 

How do you feel about those changes? 

What word or phrase would sum up the past 12 months for you? 

What mistakes did you make? 

How does those mistakes make you feel, or what’s your thoughts on them?


The word that comes to mind for me when I reflect over the past year was…Discovery, 

More clear than that, Self Discovery.

My year was full of moments of self discovery and personal awareness.

Discovery in key areas of my life such as;

My relationship with exercise and how I was using it as a mental and emotional crutch. And how this was giving me serious anxiety and overwhelm.

Discovery in my relationships with family members and the importance of correcting these and moving forward in my life.

Discovery in my own personal style and self confidence as a man. Coming to terms more with who I am and being more comfortable with that.

Discovery in what makes me happy and what I want from my future with Helenlee (my fiancee) and our life together.

Discovery in my career and what I want to do, achieve and become. Discovery on the importance of serving and coaching other people. Becoming clear on what my purpose is and where I can best help people.

These discoveries all came about at various times throughout the year however I wasn’t aware of them all until I actually sat back and reflected on my year and had a conversation about it.
This shaped my year but this will also shape my coming year. Because of all the self discovery I have made about myself, who I am, what I want, where I want my life to do, what makes me happy, what I want more of and what I want less of.
This allows me to prepare and set my intension for the next year.

This means I’m not reactive but actually proactive.

My next 12months will follow on from 2018.
By looking back and becoming aware of what we have done, this can give us clarity about the changes or continuation of what we have or haven’t been doing.
So before you settle down and start putting together your New Years resolutions, take some time to reflect on 2018 this could have a hugely positive affect on 2019 and beyond.


I’m now taking on coaching clients for 2019. 

Do you have a significant career or business dream/goal you wish to achieve?

What’s the biggest challenge you face right now in your business or career? 

Do you have a life challenge or goal that you feel you’d need support, focus or clarity to accomplish? 

What’s that one thing you want that you know when you have it will change your life? 

“I coach people on whatever is challenging them at the time or whatever opportunity is not being achieve. Helping clients self manage themselves on a daily basis to produce the results they desire most”. 

If you want to transform the results you are experiencing for 2019 and beyond then click the link below:

https://davidjohnwilkinson.wordpress.com/coaching/

How to Become MORE Confident in Yourself…

What comes to mind when you think of confidence? 

What’s that ‘thing’ you keep putting off doing or starting because you believe you lack confidence to do it? 

Do you just wish you had more self belief in yourself? 

When I think of confidence I’m always reminded of my lack of it during my teenage years. At school, college and my early working career I can honestly say I was shy. Sure I had friends, But I lacked serious confidence in myself when it came to meeting people, putting myself out there, meeting girls and pushing myself for jobs.

A massive turning point came when I was 20 and I was going on a lads holiday, I was working full time in a leisure club but the wages were poor. So I needed an extra income.

So I went down the job centre…Yeah that’s how we use to find jobs back in the day lol.

And I found a job as an assistant instructor helping teaching boxing circuit training but it was in South Shields, I lived in Durham about 45minute away drive. But the pay was ok so I though ‘what the hell’ give it a go.

I called the guy up (Harry) and he said; “Come through, take a look and see what you think of the sessions and we’ll take it from there”.

I turned up first night to take a look and there we’re over 100 people in the session…No joke. I was crapping myself. Harry told me he wanted someone to help him coach and was I interested?

All honestly I was bricking it and almost pulled out, but I needed the money and I needed to get my confidence up as a coach.

So I took that leap and did it. Within 6 weeks I was coaching the sessions, standing in front of 100 people teaching boxing and circuits.

Within 6 months I had taken over from Harry and topped out with a class of 130 people in it.

So how did I go from being a shy guy lacking self confidence…To instructing 130 people?

PRACTISE. Read that again! 

The truth is we lack confidence in the things we aren’t practised in, what we lack experience and preparation in.

Take for example; Many people are unconfident in public speaking…Why?

Because they haven’t practised it, they haven’t done enough of it.

Come back and tell me you aren’t confident at something that you’ve done for 50,100, 1000 hours.

You won’t.

The MORE you do something the more confident you become at it.

Repetition breeds confidence. 

So here’s my 3 step advice to building self confidence, and building it is the key. You start off small and keep growing it by doing the ‘right’ things that protect yourself self confidence…Then increase it.

1) Take action.

We only feel anxious about something we are thinking about, something that’s just sat on our minds. However if we move, take action, just do something we can no longer feel anxious…THIS IS TRUTH.

Anxiety will leave you as soon as you do something on that ‘thing’…However small your action is.

I called Harry up, I travelled through to South Shields, I helped clients in the session on an individual level. I built up small, I then took small parts of the session until I could take a full session.

These we’re all built up action steps from the first step which was as small as…Going to the job centre. I took action.

Take action and do it small. The smaller the better at the start (only in this case 🙂 )

Just look at the smallest step you can take TODAY that gets you moving forward. You don’t need to move mountains at the start, but you do need to start.

2) Practise, Repeat and Practise some more.

‘Practise doesn’t make perfect but practise DOES make permanent’ and that’s the habit you need. By doing something again and again you’ll remove that fear. In fact you’ll get so good at something that yo\’ll probably end up loving it.

Trust me you can not fear something you have done 100, 1000, 10,000 hours worth of. And even if you do, it’ll be so habitual to you that you’ll just soldier through regardless.

The more you practise something the more natural it will feel.

 
3) Still struggling with confidence?

Hire a Performance Coach like myself to help you overcome this.

Working with a coach to support you in moving forward towards the goals you desire.

Building the business, body, lifestyle, relationships and happiness you want can be 100% achieved by you, however the process can be simpler, less stressful and more clear with the support of a coach.

A coach can help you work through you’re barriers and limiting beliefs. If you want to move ahead in your life you WILL need to acquire more self belief in YOU. This can be done by working on it.

Affirmations and telling yourself to ‘Be more confident’ or ‘I am a confident person’ work work because theirs NO action to back them up. Habits, routines and a change in your a state of mind is what’s needed.

 

Trust me, I’m no more special that you are, and if I can do it then so can you.

That one small step I took now allows me to do the same in every other area of life.

Do I still lack confidence?

Of cause I do from time to time. I can still lack self belief in myself.

However I know that if I follow the above 3 steps I’ll get past it. These habits last a lifetime and once YOU have them then they’ll continue to serve you.

 

Alpha Dave.

What’s Running Your Business, You Or Anxiety?

Do you ever wake up some mornings feeling super motivated, like you can just go to work and crush your to do list?

What about days when you feel so overwhelmed that you get nothing done and find you’ve spent all day time wasting on social media or doing nothing of value?

You might not know it but both these are states of anxiety, stress or overwhelm and they come from an emotional reactive mindset. The issue is you could be running and managing your business from either of these emotions on any given day and not realise the negative affects its having on you and your business success.

When we manage ourselves and business from an emotional state we could actually be seriously under performing, reducing our chances of success and on the rocky road to mental, emotional and physical burn out.

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Take for example if you’re business is lacking in converted sales numbers and you don’t hit your target this month…You could get very reactive and start marketing like a mad man without really planning it all out before hand. Trying to sell your services/products without really considering the long term game.

You’ll have become reactive to an emotional state of mind.

You don’t plan your marketing, your sales, your strategy out…You just react to the moment and the thought ‘I need more sales’. And although you may very well need MORE sales, However it’s your needy approach that will kill your businesses ability to really succeed.

The key is to work daily form a place of measurable production.

The phrase “what gets measured gets done”is a phrase to live by for us self employed business owners.

The only way we can build a successful, scalable, productive and profitable business…Long term is to create production boundaries that enable us to measure our working output.

This way there’s no more working from emotions and reaction, there’s NO working for a place of feeling because this has NO PLACE in the managing of you.

Did you know that the writer Stephen King sits down everyday and writes 2000 words REGARDLESS of his mood, energy or feeling?

He doesn’t write 5000 and he doesn’t write 500, he writes 2000 and if this takes him 2 hours or 4 hours that’s what he does. He sets measurable boundaries for himself…And the results speak for themselves.

So what do you measure in your business? 

How do you measure your days productivity? 

What action steps do you create DAILY that move your business forward? 

This is just one of the things I coach my clients to do in their business and it creates relentless clarity and productivity.

I find that most business owners don’t NEED more information, they are already overload with it. What they need are new habits, structure and organisation that improves their working function, performance and mindset.

Then on top that need require accountability to doing what they said they would do to grow their business. Sometimes all you need is someone else in your corner supporting you and being a sounding board for ideas. Sometimes you need a friendly kick up the ass…And sometime you need somewhere in the middle of both.

I’m opening slots up for my Performance Coaching Program.

Go from Good to Great to Unstoppable in your life and business.  

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I’m taking on ONLY 5 business owners/self employed operators who are serious about taking 2019 by the b*lls and creating the business and life they want. I will personally support, coach and keep you accountable on a one-one basis.

 

Here’s the thing, Most coaches have a one size fits all program, then they bluff or tweak this around each client…I don’t. My coaching is completely individual to YOU because it’s your life, your goals, your personality. It’s my job to help you achieve your dreams in life and coach you as you are.

If this is you then message me direct at wilkinsondj@hotmail.com for more information and to apply for one of these spaces.

Have a productive day.

Alpha Dave.

What Do The Next 12months Look Like For You?

The weekend just gone I got confirmation that I’d passed and now completed my diploma in Performance Coaching through Newcastle College.

All in all it’s taken 10months to complete.

As I sit down with a hot cup of coffee, I start to look ahead to the next 12months and map out what it looks like

I thought I’d share with you 5 insights/realisations I have had over the past year as I worked towards my own personal goals, as it may help you if you are considering taking on a challenge or setting a goal for yourself, whether that be career, business, personal development, education or fitness.

1) You don’t need to have it all figured out.

I never had the past 12months mapped out. 12months ago all I new is a wanted to develop myself and get into professional coaching. I didn’t know how or where or what.

I started with a 3month intro course then went onto the diploma.

You may feel the same, thinking I need to figure this out and then that etc.

You don’t. You only need to figure out the next step for yourself. Then that will move you forward.

2) Doing nothing doesn’t mean nothing.

From November 2016 until January 2018 I felt lost. I didn’t know what I wanted to do with the next stage of my career.

I felt I was doing jack and that in itself was frustrating. However I spent that time thinking about what I DIDN’T want to do.

I used it as a process of elimination and that helped me get clear on what I wanted to do. Sometimes thinking about what you don’t want can help.

3) Don’t discount the little steps you make.

Dream big and go as big as you want but that doesn’t equal results.

Sometimes what we don’t realise is that the subtle small wins we make actually account to more than huge leaps toward.

For my course I spent 5-10hours per week max on the learning and assignment side of the course. That’s it, just chipping away at it every week. Now I’ve come to the end of I can say I’m proud to have stuck it out because there were times I just wanted to jack it in.

Thinking it’s too much work or I don’t have time. But in reality I was making progress every week and i reminded myself of that.

Don’t forget the small steps and small wins you have because they’ll count for more in the end.

4) Don’t wait until it’s all figured out, if you have some idea just start now.

In 2016 I set up my instagram and Facebook pages Dare to be Alpha. I haven’t actually done that much with them apart from post weekly. Putting my ideals, thoughts, content out there but with nothing to promote on the back end.

But that’s ok because it’s built a small following and a small reputation and that is all I need to grow both of those bigger.

Those platforms I can grow from. If I stated now I’d have lost 2 years of that work.

So what I’m saying to you is don’t wait, get the ball rolling now, otherwise you’ll look back in 1,2,3 years and wish you had.

5) Have a plan but if that plan changes then that’s ok because it’s only a guide anyway.

Plan all you want but so much is out of your control. Your plan creates structure and that’s good.

But a plan is nothing unless you are taking action and I believe doing something is way better.

For me I’ll plan the next few steps as a move toward a bigger goal and I encourage you to do that same.

However be flexible with your approach and be open to opportunities and other things that you might not have been aware of.

Looking at the plan is great but remember to keep looking up at what’s around you.

Alpha Dave.

Website: https://davidjohnwilkinson.wordpress.com/

What is Performance Coaching?

I get asked this question a fair bit, in fact in a recent poll I discovered that 70% of people aren’t sure what performance coaching actually is. So how are they ever going to know the real tangible benefits of what this service can bring to their lives, careers and business?

I actually explain it to my clients as ‘Performance Coaching’ however for many people this can still leave them in the dark.

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So I thought a short blog post would help clear it up.

Performance as stated by the dictionary is: “How well a person does a piece of work or task”. Other words linked to performance are; achievement, fulfilment, completion, implementation, execution.

So when I talk about performance coaching what I’m referring to is the improvement of an individuals performance so they can achieve the goals they set themselves, have greater success within their business, lives, career or get beyond certain challenges or hurdles that are holding them back.

Coaching is all about the person in front of you helping them develop, strengthen their skills, gain more confidence and self assurance, clarity and focus.

CEO of Google Eric Schmit said, “Everyone needs a coach”. 

  • If you’re performance, implementation, execution and completion of work tasks is poor, then you’re business will be perform poor.
  • If you’re un-organised, un-productive, a procrastinator or someone who lacks the ability to take action, then you’re business will struggle.
  • If you’re the type of person who struggles with clarity and the direction/vision of your business then guess what? You’re business won’t move forward or if it does move it’s likely to be in a direction you want DON’T want.
  • If you have a goal or outcome you want to achieve but are unsure ‘how’ to get there or even start then you’ll likely continue to procrastinate or have self doubt and possibly stagnate.
  • If you lack confidence in yourself or your ability to make a decisive decision then this is going make you anxious, stressed and miss potential opportunities that would be idea for you.

Now just so we are clear if you’re business and success isn’t where you want it to be right now…That’s ok, you haven’t failed in anyway. You are already a high achieving individual because you have what it takes to go out on your own. And believe me when I tell you this, I’ve struggled in business. There are times when I’ve procrastinate or lost focus and felt so overwhelmed it’s crippled me.

We are all human at the end of the day.

However, what I am talking about here are those of you who DON’T want to struggle anymore.

Those of you who want to grow, expand and take their business to that next level whether that be financial, status, size, reach etc.

Those of you how want to find clarity and focus in what you’re doing so you can wake up everyday knowing exactly what to do and how to do it.

Those of you who want a structured business and to have it running on autopilot for you. You have systems in place, your organised, you’re clear and you’re disciplined to do what you said you would do.

Those of you who want more client, to increase their reach and to get more interaction.

It’s for those who want to increase the performance and output of their business, and what I do is coach you to do just that. 

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  • I coach, support, motivate and challenge you to work towards a set goal/s or objective/s you want. 
  • I help you raise your bar, your game and the level at which you operate at. 
  • I support you in the decisions you make and action steps you focus on doing. 
  • I’m a sounding board to you. Someone who is non-biased to you and can help you objectively with the problems you face and together discover a solution you are happy with.
  • I coach you to improve your overall daily working performance so you are the most productive, focused and disciplined you can be. 
  • I help you get crystal clear on your business vision and purpose and how this fits with your life and goals. 
  • I support you to increase you’re own self development which in turn develops your business. 
  • I’m there to listen to you and support you through the changes and growth you go through. 
  • I’m there to coach and get the best out of you. 
  • I coach you to get through you’re mental barriers and limitations whether that be self doubt, loss of confidence, low motivation etc. 

 

So to conclude: 

Performance = I coach you towards your goals and to increase you’re overall performance, this results in optimal performance within your key area’s of your life, career or business that you’d like to work on, develop or grow.

Coaching = Coaching is what I do. I don’t tell you want to do, this isn’t coaching. It’s your business, your goals, your life. I support you to reach those outcomes in a personally bespoke, goal specific, action orientated, 1-1 approach.

I hope this helps clear this up and thank you for reading.

David.

 

PS: For more information about my coaching service, head over to my page: https://davidjohnwilkinson.wordpress.com/coaching/

Failing in Fitness.

Have you ever heard that failure in fitness, as in life is an essential ingredient to the over all process?

See without it we can never reach beyond our preconceived limits, we can never hit the heights of our abilities.

Within my own fitness journey over the past 2 months I have attempt a new PB in my Back squat, Front squat, Snatch and clean and jerk…And each time I’ve fallen short and not reached a new PB. Missing lift after lift over and over again. I’m getting close but just not reaching it.

However this is the reality of what can occur when ANY OF US try and push past our limits and this made me think of this blog post today.

Fitness is all about fitter, stronger, faster and improvement. Its all about small marginal gains made over a long period of time. AND the same is true for business, climbing the corporate ladder, relationships and personal development, they are all achieved and built through small marginal gains done consistently over time.

The ONLY way we can improve is to push beyond our current preconceived limitations. The thing is, when we push to our limits we are much more likely to miss the mark, make a mistake or screw up…Than we are likely to succeed.

The problem occurs when people are so fearful of making a mistake, or they fear failure, or they lack self belief in their own abilities that they are unconfident about pushing outside of these limits. So they end up living in their comfort zone. They end up procrastinating and being halted by fear.

So they end up playing it safe, staying in the comfort zone, not taking risks because of a lack of self belief. Also is he/she has ventured out before and put it on the line and failed, this has probably been fatal to their self confidence. Now meaning they are less likely to venture out again in the future.

The issue is that may of us have this impression that failure means the end, it spells disaster. But I’m a big believer in that we NEED to make mistakes so we can find our true path.

What I believe with failure is this:

  1. The route I have chosen isn’t right for me, so chose a different way. 
  2. I’m not ready to be at that level right now, but in time I will be. 
  3. I must work harder and smarter. 
  4. I’ve learned something that I can change for next time to get a different outcome.
  5. Failure isn’t the end, its an opportunity to learn, adapt and put things right for next time. 

The saying “We win or we learn” is a great saying because its true. If you don’t get the outcome or result you we’re hoping for, you actually learned something that can be implemented next time so you get a different outcome.

Remember that FAILURE is NEVER FINAL. It’s only showing us that the route we have taken may not be right…So go another way.  

We learn through our mistakes and as long as we aren’t fearful of doing so we can pick up on valuable lessons that make us better next time. I encourage you to find a successful person in the world who hasn’t failed more often than they have won.

Anyone who wants to achieve more whether that be in the gym, sport, business, career, income or life will have to taste preconceived failure more often than they taste success. This is the price we pay for going to our limits. This is what raises our own bar and takes us to that next level in whatever our venture is.

To move us forward in life we will have to go to our limits and continue to push to break through them. During training, in the lab, in the office, at home or where ever it is you do your work, you will have to drop the ego and embrace the screw ups and mistakes…Because its all part of the learning process.

Then sometime in the not so distant future when it matters, when it happens, when it’s go time, when all eyes are on you…that’s when you’ll hit your next level, your PB. That’s when you’ll achieve your personal greatness, that’s when you’ll past your current sticking point. That’s when all the f**k ups are forgotten for that moment of glory and success.

Failure in fitness is like life, it has to happen for us to push past it toward future greatness….Because failure is never final and its never fatal. 

Failure is never final or fatal unless you ALLOW it to be. 

I dare you to do that thing that’s making you feel scared and unsure of yourself. I dare you to try that new PB in the gym. I dare you to train for that marathon. I dare you to enter that competition, I dare you to pursue your passions in life, I dare you to enhance your knowledge,  I dare you to step up and try. I dare you to learn from your mistakes and use that to get a better outcome next time…

I dare you to try it over and over again and see what outcome you get.

Because the reality of the situation is this…You deserve to make your life the best it can become and you owe it to yourself to at the very least TRY.

Alpha Dave.

PS: Failure is never Final…We either win or we learn.