What’s Running Your Business, You Or Anxiety?

Do you ever wake up some mornings feeling super motivated, like you can just go to work and crush your to do list?

What about days when you feel so overwhelmed that you get nothing done and find you’ve spent all day time wasting on social media or doing nothing of value?

You might not know it but both these are states of anxiety, stress or overwhelm and they come from an emotional reactive mindset. The issue is you could be running and managing your business from either of these emotions on any given day and not realise the negative affects its having on you and your business success.

When we manage ourselves and business from an emotional state we could actually be seriously under performing, reducing our chances of success and on the rocky road to mental, emotional and physical burn out.

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Take for example if you’re business is lacking in converted sales numbers and you don’t hit your target this month…You could get very reactive and start marketing like a mad man without really planning it all out before hand. Trying to sell your services/products without really considering the long term game.

You’ll have become reactive to an emotional state of mind.

You don’t plan your marketing, your sales, your strategy out…You just react to the moment and the thought ‘I need more sales’. And although you may very well need MORE sales, However it’s your needy approach that will kill your businesses ability to really succeed.

The key is to work daily form a place of measurable production.

The phrase “what gets measured gets done”is a phrase to live by for us self employed business owners.

The only way we can build a successful, scalable, productive and profitable business…Long term is to create production boundaries that enable us to measure our working output.

This way there’s no more working from emotions and reaction, there’s NO working for a place of feeling because this has NO PLACE in the managing of you.

Did you know that the writer Stephen King sits down everyday and writes 2000 words REGARDLESS of his mood, energy or feeling?

He doesn’t write 5000 and he doesn’t write 500, he writes 2000 and if this takes him 2 hours or 4 hours that’s what he does. He sets measurable boundaries for himself…And the results speak for themselves.

So what do you measure in your business? 

How do you measure your days productivity? 

What action steps do you create DAILY that move your business forward? 

This is just one of the things I coach my clients to do in their business and it creates relentless clarity and productivity.

I find that most business owners don’t NEED more information, they are already overload with it. What they need are new habits, structure and organisation that improves their working function, performance and mindset.

Then on top that need require accountability to doing what they said they would do to grow their business. Sometimes all you need is someone else in your corner supporting you and being a sounding board for ideas. Sometimes you need a friendly kick up the ass…And sometime you need somewhere in the middle of both.

I’m opening slots up for my Performance Coaching Program.

Go from Good to Great to Unstoppable in your life and business.  

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I’m taking on ONLY 5 business owners/self employed operators who are serious about taking 2019 by the b*lls and creating the business and life they want. I will personally support, coach and keep you accountable on a one-one basis.

 

Here’s the thing, Most coaches have a one size fits all program, then they bluff or tweak this around each client…I don’t. My coaching is completely individual to YOU because it’s your life, your goals, your personality. It’s my job to help you achieve your dreams in life and coach you as you are.

If this is you then message me direct at wilkinsondj@hotmail.com for more information and to apply for one of these spaces.

Have a productive day.

Alpha Dave.

What Do The Next 12months Look Like For You?

The weekend just gone I got confirmation that I’d passed and now completed my diploma in Performance Coaching through Newcastle College.

All in all it’s taken 10months to complete.

As I sit down with a hot cup of coffee, I start to look ahead to the next 12months and map out what it looks like

I thought I’d share with you 5 insights/realisations I have had over the past year as I worked towards my own personal goals, as it may help you if you are considering taking on a challenge or setting a goal for yourself, whether that be career, business, personal development, education or fitness.

1) You don’t need to have it all figured out.

I never had the past 12months mapped out. 12months ago all I new is a wanted to develop myself and get into professional coaching. I didn’t know how or where or what.

I started with a 3month intro course then went onto the diploma.

You may feel the same, thinking I need to figure this out and then that etc.

You don’t. You only need to figure out the next step for yourself. Then that will move you forward.

2) Doing nothing doesn’t mean nothing.

From November 2016 until January 2018 I felt lost. I didn’t know what I wanted to do with the next stage of my career.

I felt I was doing jack and that in itself was frustrating. However I spent that time thinking about what I DIDN’T want to do.

I used it as a process of elimination and that helped me get clear on what I wanted to do. Sometimes thinking about what you don’t want can help.

3) Don’t discount the little steps you make.

Dream big and go as big as you want but that doesn’t equal results.

Sometimes what we don’t realise is that the subtle small wins we make actually account to more than huge leaps toward.

For my course I spent 5-10hours per week max on the learning and assignment side of the course. That’s it, just chipping away at it every week. Now I’ve come to the end of I can say I’m proud to have stuck it out because there were times I just wanted to jack it in.

Thinking it’s too much work or I don’t have time. But in reality I was making progress every week and i reminded myself of that.

Don’t forget the small steps and small wins you have because they’ll count for more in the end.

4) Don’t wait until it’s all figured out, if you have some idea just start now.

In 2016 I set up my instagram and Facebook pages Dare to be Alpha. I haven’t actually done that much with them apart from post weekly. Putting my ideals, thoughts, content out there but with nothing to promote on the back end.

But that’s ok because it’s built a small following and a small reputation and that is all I need to grow both of those bigger.

Those platforms I can grow from. If I stated now I’d have lost 2 years of that work.

So what I’m saying to you is don’t wait, get the ball rolling now, otherwise you’ll look back in 1,2,3 years and wish you had.

5) Have a plan but if that plan changes then that’s ok because it’s only a guide anyway.

Plan all you want but so much is out of your control. Your plan creates structure and that’s good.

But a plan is nothing unless you are taking action and I believe doing something is way better.

For me I’ll plan the next few steps as a move toward a bigger goal and I encourage you to do that same.

However be flexible with your approach and be open to opportunities and other things that you might not have been aware of.

Looking at the plan is great but remember to keep looking up at what’s around you.

Alpha Dave.

Website: https://davidjohnwilkinson.wordpress.com/

What is Performance Coaching?

I get asked this question a fair bit, in fact in a recent poll I discovered that 70% of people aren’t sure what performance coaching actually is. So how are they ever going to know the real tangible benefits of what this service can bring to their lives, careers and business?

I actually explain it to my clients as ‘Performance Coaching’ however for many people this can still leave them in the dark.

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So I thought a short blog post would help clear it up.

Performance as stated by the dictionary is: “How well a person does a piece of work or task”. Other words linked to performance are; achievement, fulfilment, completion, implementation, execution.

So when I talk about performance coaching what I’m referring to is the improvement of an individuals performance so they can achieve the goals they set themselves, have greater success within their business, lives, career or get beyond certain challenges or hurdles that are holding them back.

Coaching is all about the person in front of you helping them develop, strengthen their skills, gain more confidence and self assurance, clarity and focus.

CEO of Google Eric Schmit said, “Everyone needs a coach”. 

  • If you’re performance, implementation, execution and completion of work tasks is poor, then you’re business will be perform poor.
  • If you’re un-organised, un-productive, a procrastinator or someone who lacks the ability to take action, then you’re business will struggle.
  • If you’re the type of person who struggles with clarity and the direction/vision of your business then guess what? You’re business won’t move forward or if it does move it’s likely to be in a direction you want DON’T want.
  • If you have a goal or outcome you want to achieve but are unsure ‘how’ to get there or even start then you’ll likely continue to procrastinate or have self doubt and possibly stagnate.
  • If you lack confidence in yourself or your ability to make a decisive decision then this is going make you anxious, stressed and miss potential opportunities that would be idea for you.

Now just so we are clear if you’re business and success isn’t where you want it to be right now…That’s ok, you haven’t failed in anyway. You are already a high achieving individual because you have what it takes to go out on your own. And believe me when I tell you this, I’ve struggled in business. There are times when I’ve procrastinate or lost focus and felt so overwhelmed it’s crippled me.

We are all human at the end of the day.

However, what I am talking about here are those of you who DON’T want to struggle anymore.

Those of you who want to grow, expand and take their business to that next level whether that be financial, status, size, reach etc.

Those of you how want to find clarity and focus in what you’re doing so you can wake up everyday knowing exactly what to do and how to do it.

Those of you who want a structured business and to have it running on autopilot for you. You have systems in place, your organised, you’re clear and you’re disciplined to do what you said you would do.

Those of you who want more client, to increase their reach and to get more interaction.

It’s for those who want to increase the performance and output of their business, and what I do is coach you to do just that. 

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  • I coach, support, motivate and challenge you to work towards a set goal/s or objective/s you want. 
  • I help you raise your bar, your game and the level at which you operate at. 
  • I support you in the decisions you make and action steps you focus on doing. 
  • I’m a sounding board to you. Someone who is non-biased to you and can help you objectively with the problems you face and together discover a solution you are happy with.
  • I coach you to improve your overall daily working performance so you are the most productive, focused and disciplined you can be. 
  • I help you get crystal clear on your business vision and purpose and how this fits with your life and goals. 
  • I support you to increase you’re own self development which in turn develops your business. 
  • I’m there to listen to you and support you through the changes and growth you go through. 
  • I’m there to coach and get the best out of you. 
  • I coach you to get through you’re mental barriers and limitations whether that be self doubt, loss of confidence, low motivation etc. 

 

So to conclude: 

Performance = I coach you towards your goals and to increase you’re overall performance, this results in optimal performance within your key area’s of your life, career or business that you’d like to work on, develop or grow.

Coaching = Coaching is what I do. I don’t tell you want to do, this isn’t coaching. It’s your business, your goals, your life. I support you to reach those outcomes in a personally bespoke, goal specific, action orientated, 1-1 approach.

I hope this helps clear this up and thank you for reading.

David.

 

PS: For more information about my coaching service, head over to my page: https://davidjohnwilkinson.wordpress.com/coaching/

Failing in Fitness.

Have you ever heard that failure in fitness, as in life is an essential ingredient to the over all process?

See without it we can never reach beyond our preconceived limits, we can never hit the heights of our abilities.

Within my own fitness journey over the past 2 months I have attempt a new PB in my Back squat, Front squat, Snatch and clean and jerk…And each time I’ve fallen short and not reached a new PB. Missing lift after lift over and over again. I’m getting close but just not reaching it.

However this is the reality of what can occur when ANY OF US try and push past our limits and this made me think of this blog post today.

Fitness is all about fitter, stronger, faster and improvement. Its all about small marginal gains made over a long period of time. AND the same is true for business, climbing the corporate ladder, relationships and personal development, they are all achieved and built through small marginal gains done consistently over time.

The ONLY way we can improve is to push beyond our current preconceived limitations. The thing is, when we push to our limits we are much more likely to miss the mark, make a mistake or screw up…Than we are likely to succeed.

The problem occurs when people are so fearful of making a mistake, or they fear failure, or they lack self belief in their own abilities that they are unconfident about pushing outside of these limits. So they end up living in their comfort zone. They end up procrastinating and being halted by fear.

So they end up playing it safe, staying in the comfort zone, not taking risks because of a lack of self belief. Also is he/she has ventured out before and put it on the line and failed, this has probably been fatal to their self confidence. Now meaning they are less likely to venture out again in the future.

The issue is that may of us have this impression that failure means the end, it spells disaster. But I’m a big believer in that we NEED to make mistakes so we can find our true path.

What I believe with failure is this:

  1. The route I have chosen isn’t right for me, so chose a different way. 
  2. I’m not ready to be at that level right now, but in time I will be. 
  3. I must work harder and smarter. 
  4. I’ve learned something that I can change for next time to get a different outcome.
  5. Failure isn’t the end, its an opportunity to learn, adapt and put things right for next time. 

The saying “We win or we learn” is a great saying because its true. If you don’t get the outcome or result you we’re hoping for, you actually learned something that can be implemented next time so you get a different outcome.

Remember that FAILURE is NEVER FINAL. It’s only showing us that the route we have taken may not be right…So go another way.  

We learn through our mistakes and as long as we aren’t fearful of doing so we can pick up on valuable lessons that make us better next time. I encourage you to find a successful person in the world who hasn’t failed more often than they have won.

Anyone who wants to achieve more whether that be in the gym, sport, business, career, income or life will have to taste preconceived failure more often than they taste success. This is the price we pay for going to our limits. This is what raises our own bar and takes us to that next level in whatever our venture is.

To move us forward in life we will have to go to our limits and continue to push to break through them. During training, in the lab, in the office, at home or where ever it is you do your work, you will have to drop the ego and embrace the screw ups and mistakes…Because its all part of the learning process.

Then sometime in the not so distant future when it matters, when it happens, when it’s go time, when all eyes are on you…that’s when you’ll hit your next level, your PB. That’s when you’ll achieve your personal greatness, that’s when you’ll past your current sticking point. That’s when all the f**k ups are forgotten for that moment of glory and success.

Failure in fitness is like life, it has to happen for us to push past it toward future greatness….Because failure is never final and its never fatal. 

Failure is never final or fatal unless you ALLOW it to be. 

I dare you to do that thing that’s making you feel scared and unsure of yourself. I dare you to try that new PB in the gym. I dare you to train for that marathon. I dare you to enter that competition, I dare you to pursue your passions in life, I dare you to enhance your knowledge,  I dare you to step up and try. I dare you to learn from your mistakes and use that to get a better outcome next time…

I dare you to try it over and over again and see what outcome you get.

Because the reality of the situation is this…You deserve to make your life the best it can become and you owe it to yourself to at the very least TRY.

Alpha Dave.

PS: Failure is never Final…We either win or we learn. 

Discover Your True Potential.

How often do we look at where we are in relation to our goals and think…

“I’m still miles away”. Or “I just feel like I’m no further forward”. Or “It’s to hard”. 

With ANY goal what we should understand is that it’s about doing, achieving, having or reaching something we DON’T already have. And with any goal that’s worth while, it’s probably something that isn’t easily attainable.

If it were easy to achieve we’d have no motivation for it, right?

I’m a huge believer that we can achieve MOST things in life if we set our minds to it. I don’t believe we can have anything we want because there will always be limiting factors such as ability, skill, knowledge, genetics etc that come into play.

HOWEVER for 85-90% of our goals we can achieve them as long as we are willing to put the consistent hard work in and level up as a person. (YES you will need to develop yourself to reach a new goal or level, I’ve wrote many blogs on this)

How to Discover Your True Potential. 

The issue that many people have (me included from time to time) is that we want our goals NOW, TODAY and we want everything yesterday. We want to reach our potential NOW. 

Let’s take for example opening a new business. We get an idea. We design our product/service. We put our systems in place. We get our branding done and we market it…Then nothing really happens. We might get a few new customers but our business just doesn’t seem to taking off. Then in a few years we’re wondering why we aren’t as big as Apple or Starbucks, or even other business locally to us.

This is that instant gratification BS causing us to feel this way.

We have guru’s telling us we can be whatever we want to be, we can have want ever we want. We look at social media and see all these people building a personal or business brand and it looks so easy. We see these athletes reaching new levels of fitness, strength and speed and it looks simple. We see fitness models showing off their bodies and believe we can achieve the same with just a few simple exercises per day.

We live in a world of NOW, instant results, instant gratification and instant success.

But anyone with half a brain knows that success is anything but instant. 

If we desire REAL long term success and reach that LEVEL we desire whether that be in business, career, sport, wealth or areas of life such as fitness and health, they are achieved via ‘marginal gains’ done through consistent effort.  

Marginal gains is where the magic happens. Marginal gains is where you discover and harness your POTENTIAL.

Let’s take for example an Athlete, lets says Football since it’s the World Cup.

A footballer needs skill, strength, speed, stamina, mental toughness, nutrition, speedy recovery, a strong team attitude…Just to name a few attributes.

Take each of these areas and let’s say for a player to reach their ‘true potential’ they’ll need to be or as close to 100% in each area. The likely hood of this happening is very slim but humour me for a minute.

Let’s say right now your scores are:

  • Skill 70%
  • Strength 65%
  • Speed 90% 
  • Stamina 75% 
  • Mental 90% 
  • Nutrition 50% 
  • Recovery 40% 
  • Team attitude 95% 

Most people do 1 of 3 options:

  1. They look at their weaker areas and try to increase these as soon as possible. So they will take nutrition and recovery and focus solidly on these to increase their scores. However they end up neglecting other areas. So nutrition might go to 80% but their speed drops to 70% and there stamina to 50%. So they end up losing out in other areas and actually potentially worsen their performance.
  2. Some just focus on their strengths and leave their weaknesses. They think if they just work harder on their strengths then everything will be ok. However the more they focus on their strength areas and ignore their weaknesses…The weaker those areas become. Speed goes up to 95% but recovery drops to 35%. They are actually no further forward.

The secret is option number 3, the marginal gains approach. 

3. A smart individual looks at making a steady, consistent and focused 1% increase in each area everyday or every week. So they focus on nutrition and improve by 1%, same with strength, skill etc. They continue every week to progress these by 1% marginal gains.

Overtime they raise their entire game, results, ability and success via an ‘all round’ approach.

This approach takes longer and requires patience, however the results achieved through this approach are much more long term and sustainable.

It’s about making a 1% improvement in EACH and every area and continually doing this month on month, year on year. It’s through these small, consistent incremental steps that done over time get us to our goal.


If we only look for instance success and gratification then we could be heading for disappointment. If we are tying to take bigger leaps than we are capable of then we could end up burning out, screwing up, neglecting other areas and not really understanding what we need to do consistently that can make us a success. We don’t lay the foundations.


Marginal, consistent gains is where the magic happens, its where you harness what you’re potentially capable of as a human.

Remember any successful athlete, entrepreneur or individual when you follow them online or watch their videos you are often just seeing the end result, their highlight reel, their moment in the sun. Unfortunately that leads to this instant gratification need and belief that success is a given right.

However what you didn’t see are the years and years and years it took of marginal gains, sacrifice, effort, constant commitment and mental fortitude it took to get to that level.

Focus on the longer game and make small forward steps consistently and through this you’ll discover what you are truly capable of.

 

Alpha Dave.

What Do You Do If You Don’t Have Time?

You say you don’t have time and struggle to find the time to work on your goals…

I say…BS.

I’m not going to beat around the bush here, I’m going straight into it.

You say you don’t have time to work on your goals…I say you’re not MAKING the time.

Let’s break down the ‘lack of time myth’:

– You have 168 hours per week…WE ALL HAVE THIS. Everyone from you, to Bill Gates and Serena Williams.

– Sleep for 50 of them (average 7hours per night)

– Work for 40 of them,

– Groom for 8 of them,

– Eat and drink for 10 of them…

So how are you spending the other 60 hours, or more specifically 8.5hours per day?

Let’s say you have other commitments, longer working hours, family, gym, commuting to work etc.

ALL that taken into account are you REALLY telling me you don’t have JUST 60 minutes spare per day to work on your dreams?

JUST 7hours per week MAX. 

If you read this and say “No I still don’t have time”. Then my advise to you is your goals aren’t enough for you because if you can’t carve out a little time to work on your dreams then your dreams aren’t for you.

That’s all it takes to get started, 60minutes per day to to work on your dream body, life, business, career or whatever your ambition is.

For most people to find 60minutes extra per day just need to stop mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram and they’ll find time.

Imagine if you just did 60minutes today on your goal, that’s an extra 60minutes you’ve spent on your goal today than you did yesterday. By doing this you are now at least ONE step closer to the outcome you want.

Everything in life in HOW you view it from your perspective. This is partly what MINDSET is.

Someone says; “I don’t have time”.

I say; “You’re not making time”. All because we are both looking at it from different angles.

Change the way you view things and this will transform how you spend those valuable minutes.

You’re either moving closer to your dreams or further away and this comes down to your value of time and how you use it.

Alpha Dave

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What Do You Do If You’re NOT Good Enough?

Throughout your life you will come up against hurdles and challenges you weren’t prepared to face. Things that will derail you from your goals if you allow them.

There are going to be times when you just aren’t enough to meet your goals. You won’t be fit enough, strong enough, smart enough or experienced enough to attain the outcome/s you want.

Even with all the fuzzy motivational, affirmation, “You can do it” BS out there the facts are as simple as black and white.

  • Sometimes in life you just won’t be good enough to meet the mark.
  • Sometimes you’ll go after a goal in life and you will miss it.
  • Sometimes in life you’ll go after a new job and you’ll be rejected.
  • Sometimes in life you’ll go after attaining the outcome you desire and you won’t be good enough.

All the wishful thinking, positive mental attitude and reciting affirmation over and over again WON’T bridge that cap between where you ARE…And Where you WANT to be.

HOWEVER…

This is not the time to quit or tell yourself you aren’t enough.

This IS the time to MAKE yourself good enough.

I don’t care what people out there say, If you are willing to put in enough effort, hard work, sacrifice, commitment, positive moves, adjustments, work on yourself, your mindset, body, confidence and build the right support network around you…

There’s very little you WON’T achieve.

Of cause we’re not all made to be LeBron James, or Usain Bolts. Genetics does play a part in some physical and mental capacities.

BUT..

It’s easy to quit and put off your dreams by saying,

“Well he or she was born that way”. “They have better genetics than me”. 

Or, “They’re lucky”. 

Or, “They have it different to me, my life’s different”. 

These boring, worn out excuses are easier to recite as a way of explaining peoples lack of commitment to their success…Than it is to roll up the sleeves and dig deep.

You have a choice, When you miss the mark on your goals and aren’t enough to reach them right now, you can either hide away in your shell and spout off BS excuses…

OR you can get your head down and MAKE yourself good enough.

– This is the time to train harder, push further and do more than your competitors are willing to doing.

– This is the time to get your head down, learn more, study harder, make adjustments to your social life and become more educated.

– This is the time to put the work in, pay your dues, work smarter and get experienced within your profession.

Through hard work, consistent effort, sacrifice, patience and some sheer grit…IT is the time to MAKE yourself good enough so that one day soon you CAN reach your goals.

There are NO easy quick fix or any motivational quote I can put in here to leave you feeling all fuzzy and warm inside that everything will be ok.

The ONLY way you and I will EVER achieve our ambitions is if we make ourselves do it and make ourselves GOOD ENOUGH to have them.

Alpha Dave

What WILL Your NEXT 90days Look Like?

We are already into the final quarter of the year, the last 90days.

Where has the time gone?

So with this in mind, What will the next 90day look like for you? 

>> At the start of the year what goals, aims and ambitions did you set yourself? 

>> Are you on track with your goals? 

>> Have you achieved them?

>> Or maybe you haven’t started yet?

This blog is for those of you who haven’t yet started your goals or have continued to put them off all year.

For whatever reason this is the case, I’m here to let you know that there’s still time.

There’s still time to get on track with these. There might even still be enough time to accomplish them.

So often people set goals, but they ‘just’ talk about them.

“I’m going to do this” 

“I’m going to achieve this” 

“I’m fed up and sick of X so I’m going to do Y” 

(You can insert your own goals into the above).

We talk about what we want, what we are going to do and we’ll tell anyone who’ll listen.

“This is my goal” or “This is what Im going to do” Or “Enough is enough I’m changing X as of monday”. 

Aka…We TALK.

That feeling when we say those words and feel that sense of relief when we unburned that feeling of making a change. We set ourselves a goal and now a deadline…

“When I get back from my holidays I’ll…”

“Come monday thats it for me”. 

“Come the start of the year I’m going to start…”. 

We talk and we talk.

But is there much ‘DOING’ getting done? 

 

At some point the talking has to STOP and the doing has to START – Alpha Dave. 

 

So are you going to continue talking about what you want, putting it off and making excuses up for yourself…Or are you actually going to do what you said your going to do?

 

See its easy to talk, its easy to tell everyone your story, it’s easier to feel that sense of relief lifting when you unburned your goals and ambitions onto others.

However…

When does the ‘DOING’ begin for you? When do you start taking ACTION? 

Or does monday come around again and your STILL doing the same old thing, living the same life without ANY change.

 

I’m not here to p*ss on your parade, But also not here to cuddle you and tell you that your goals with happen WITHOUT you doing something/anything.

You have just under 90days to get on track and make some progress towards your goals before this years out.

It’s not to late.

Avoid putting it off until Monday, avoid putting it off until Xmas or in telling yourself you’ll start in January.

Your quite frankly just BS yourself. Your telling yourself what’s easiest to do NOW…continue to put off starting what you KNOW if going to transform your life.

The hardest part is starting, I get that.

But guess whats harder?

You staying and feeling the same way you do right now. Feeling unhappy, anxious, down, fed up, frustrated, in pain or whatever else your feeling.

NOW is the time to start.

Get out there today and JUST TAKE ONE STEP. That’s all it takes…Just do one thing to start your journey.

The minute you do this you’ll feel relieved and you’ll start to gain momentum. Then once you’ve done this…Take another step.

You’ve got just less than 90days to start turning your dreams into a reality…Can you afford to wait any longer!

Dare to believe in yourself…Dare to be Alpha.

Alpha Dave.

 

 

 

Confidence Comes From Doing The WORK.

 

I know I personally ‘lack’ confidence in something or an area of life, sport, business etc when I haven’t put the practise in.

So if you’re unconfident…How do you become MORE confident in yourself? 

Because the lack of THIS might ‘just’ be the difference between you opening your dream business, going for it in your sport or pursuing your life’s ambitions…

OR you continuing to put it off or you telling yourself reasons as to why you can’t.  

I remember back when I was in secondary school I was a shy unconfident person. To the people who didn’t know me they would probably say I was shy and quite. I was different with those around me, my close friends and family I was the normal outgoing Dave. This is because I was practised in their company. They took and new me for who I was.

But from the outside looking in I was shy and I was worried that people wouldn’t like or accept me. I just didn’t think there was anything special about me. This comes from a self worth issue.

HOWEVER…

This had to change because it affected me when it came to being outgoing. I struggled to get to know people beyond my close circle and struggled even more so with the opposite sex. This became more apparent the older I got and the more into my teens. I just lacked the self confidence to go up to a girl and talk to her.

As I went through School and then into Collage I also new I wanted to work in health and fitness, I wanted to coach people for a living. My dream of becoming personal trainer and a group instructor was in my opinion was going to be affected by my lack of self confidence.

So I did what I thought was best…I threw myself in at the deep end.

I pushed myself to do the work. I contacted a guy who was looking for Boxercise class instructors to assist him in coaching his sessions. I had the skills, I had the knowledge but around new people I was shy.

I remember turning up at this guys first class, I thought they’ll be 15-20 people there max and it won’t be so bad. How wrong I was.

I walked into a class of over 100 people. To say I was put onto the back foot is an understatement. At first it was all about assisting him, but he told me he wanted me to start coaching the classes…I was crapping myself.

But it was a case of teach the class, or quit. But for me quitting is not an option, especially when its just a self doubt issue.

Bit by bit i was introducing myself more to the clients. I practised the workouts and movements at home. I was pushing myself to get my personal skill and with it confidence levels up so I’d be ready to coach.

See I’m a HUGE believe that confidence comes from DOING…Not ‘just’ from listening to motivational tapes, videos or speaking to a therapist. Sure these ALL help…But for me, it comes through DOING. Getting in there and giving it a go. At some point the theory and talk has to stop and the DOING needs to start.

And when you do this you’ll either know its for you and you can continue to get better…or you’ll shy away from it and move onto something else.

F**k it…I jumped in.

My first class, there were almost 90 people in the room and I though…”Screw it, it’s sink or swim time”.

I got in there and gave it all i had.

Was it perfect? Hell No.

Was I crapping myself? Hell Yes.

Did I eventually go on and coach more sessions and deliver a class to over 130 people? Hell Yes I did.

And that was it for me.

LESSON LEARNED:- Anytime I lack confidence in myself, when I come up against something new, a challenge, a fear or self doubt I throw myself into it and practise it. I put the work in and then do it until it becomes comfortable. 

This mentality has seen me through: 

  • Taking over those Boxercise classes and running them myself. 
  • Trekking to Everest Base Camp for 3 weeks and then running the Mount Everest Marathon at 21 years old. 
  • Travelling the world for 8months at the age of 22. 
  • Starting my first training bootcamp and PT business in over 6 locations around the North East of England. 
  • Opening and co-owning my first gym at 25. 
  • Having the confidence to walk up, meet and talk to the love of my life Helenlee. 
  • Closing down my gym with Helenlee because it wasn’t going in the direction of life I wanted anymore. 
  • Starting a New business in consulting and motivational speaking (What I do now)  
  • Starting competitive Crossfit and training to be a full time Crossfit Athlete. 
  • Going to the European Team Crossfit Championships as part of a team in just over 1 year in the sport. 
  • And the journey continues…

 

Confidence comes from doing the work. We all lack confidence in certain areas of life, especially those that are unknown to us. The ONLY REAL way to overcome these and to get past the fear is through doing.

As humans we are built to be cautious, it’s in our make-up and we will shy away from things that makes us feel uncomfortable. This is OK unless the thing/s you are shying away from are what YOU NEED TO DO to make your dreams a reality.

If this is the case you have 2 choices:

  1. Continue to shy away and miss out on your dreams and ambitions in life.
  2. Face them head on, get stuck in and put the work in. 

The choice is yours.

Dare to be Alpha

Alpha Dave